dating me!

So I took a poll on facebook about going to the movies by myself.  It has been decided that since my husband is deployed (and that is clearly a noble reason to leave me) that I can take myself out on the weekends if I can't find any friends to accompany me.  So I asked myself out for tomorrow afternoon. And myself said yes. And that annoying song from girls camp "im a nut" has been resonating in my head for the past 3 hours because of it.

"called myself upon the phone

just to hear my golden tone

asked myself out on a date

picked me up at half past eight."

 

I'll make sure the next verse of the song doesn't happen. I'm hoping this little experiment in dating myself will feel liberating...like sound of music, running through the hills in wide open spaces, not a care in the world (until you find out about the ensuing war) liberation and not lame and embarrassing. Guess we will find out!

trip down memory lane

I havent posted in awhile so this may be a bit long...sorry.  A few weeks ago David and I got sealed. It was the most amazing day.  The temple sealing was greater and more beautiful than I could have imagined.  And the day was so pretty. The sun was out and the skies were blue (I totally got a sunburn though...oops) Last week we had to move out of our apartment as we prepared for an upcoming deployment (which actually started today but I will get to that later).  As I moved the last boxes out of the apartment and scrubbed every nook and crannie in the place, I couldn't help but smile at the memories that tiny one bedroom apartment had.  We didnt have any furniture when we first moved in. We slept for 3 days on the floor until a mattress could be delivered to us with all the blankets and sheets we had(which was not very many) piled under us for "padding".  We didn't have a table either so we ate off a cardboard box covered in a blanket while seated cross legged on the floor. And the first time the ward missionaries and the bishop came over we all had a little pow wow session on the floor because we had no couches lit by one tiny lamp because that is all we had. At the time it was a little ridiculous (and uncomfortable) but looking back I think those were my favorite things about it. It was kinda sad moving out of a place with so many memories.  But I'm sure we will not settle down in one area for many many more years because of the military so I'll just have to keep all the memories locked in my mind. And now for the big news. David left today. For 7 months.  I kept it together on the ship until the very end when we were saying our last goodbyes and then I lost it. I got back to the hotel room we had been in for almost a week together, now empty, and immediately flung myself across the bed and bawled.  And then I decided that I really did want to see the ship leave the pier (after I had convinced myself that I did not want to see that) so I got back in the car and rushed back to base just in time to see them sailing off maning the rails.  It was quite a site.  And underneath my tears and sadness I did feel a little bit of pride. I know the next 7 months will be hard but it will be a learning experience also.  Already I wish that over the past couple months I wouldn't have picked some pointless little fights over things that didn't really matter and when he gets home I will work harder on not sweating the small stuff.  Good luck Mighty Iron Nickel! You will be missed!

Just a day on The Iron Nickel

Yesterday was family cruise day on the USS Peleliu.  It all started off at 1:30am with an obnoxious phone call that dragged my sleepy husband out of bed and into work.  I followed him to the ship a few hours later with a few kids and some extra friends in tow.  By the time we got on board around 6:30 am I was worn out!! And there was still a very long and full day ahead of us.

These helmets are super heavy and have the stuff that bullet proof vests are made of inside them.  hardcore!

This is the entrance to where David works on the ship.  Its super secret.

On the flight deck of LHA-5.  It was cold and rainy in the morning but ended up being a BEAUTIFUL day.

I guess we are not cut out to be sailors.  By the end of the day my hair was a mess, my sweater was dirty, and my neck hurt and this little one just had to take a nap.  Overall though, the day was pretty great.

Hold to the Rod...yeah the one made out of rope

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This is what happens when you cross an out of control fog machine with a very sensitive smoke alarm.  The idea was pretty awesome...the execution not so much.  Too bad when they figured this out there were already about 20 children gathered for the primary activity entitled "red is for courage".  I think the big red fire truck was quite appropriate for the day actually and they should have just claimed they did it on purpose.  And honestly it made waking up early on a saturday sooo much better.  The best part was overhearing perplexed firemen discuss the rope that was running throughout the building.  "Apparently," they said, " this rope is not here all the time and is somehow part of the activity for today and has nothing to do with their church".  Ahh yes Mr. Fireman.  That is in fact the iron rod.  AKA the word of God.  And we hang on to it so we don't get lost in the building (thats what we told the kids anyway). (Oh by the way the fog was for the part of the dream where they pass through the mist.  It worked fine without it though) Thankfully the rest of the activity went smoothly and even more thankfully there are such things as primary songs to occupy bunches of children dressed in red while the firemen figured out how to turn the alarms off.

 

This happens to be Head, Shoulders, Knees and toes in Spanish!  Who knew they were that smart!?

In the spirit of Hooyah

I did a google search on "military spouse" and this is what came up.  Quite telling if you ask me.  (and arent you proud I figured out how to post a picture?)  Lately I have been feeling like this far too often.  I have found that a lot of my prayers are devoted to asking for assistance to calm my angry feelings toward this crazy job that I am ashamed to admit are often times misdirected at my wonderful husband. My health is declining both mentally and physically and sometimes I sit down and cry as my mind convinces myself I cant do this anymore. Then right before I total annihilation of body and spirit occurs a tiny bit of strength offering a small glimmer of hope rises from somewhere in my being and I wipe off my tears and move on with my day.   This life that is dictated by something other than myself is exhausting but I am trying my best because I love my spouse and he loves what he does.  And I suppose if he wasn't doing it someone else would have to be and I would not wish that on anyone I know.  On a happier note the military in a strange way has led me to what I want to do with my life.  And has made me appreciate life more. Things can change in an instant and I wont be the only one to tell you that they often do.  In fact, I cant remember the last time David told me something related to work that didnt change by the end of the day.  And even though I spend lots of hours mad, I would be lying if I didn't say at the end of the day I'm not proud to see this... HOOYAH!

just a bunch of side notes

Now I think would be the perfect time to post pictures. David came home after three weeks of being away, Easter happened, spent conference weekend with the family.  Yes this would be perfect for me to figure out how to post pictures...except I didnt take any.  Once again I failed to take pictures. I brought my camera. I brought a freshly charged battery (my camera battery dies super often) and I still did not take a single picture. I once upon a time took pictures of everything (not as good as some of my friends or family members...cough cough aunty jade) but I was always there with camera in hand to snap at least a few.  If I plan on making it back to Europe in the next couple years I better start learning to take some pictures! (random side note...I was kept up late last night by a party in the apartment above me...on a Monday yes I know that's weird...so I watched the travel channel.  A channel I flip to on occasion but have never before watched this particular show.  It started off in Edinburgh.  I didnt realize how well I knew those streets. I found myself talking to the TV...turn left there! you will find the cutest and most delicious pub or turn right there if you fancy a quaint little shop with amazing chocolate soup! And when the people on the show started to climb Arthur's Seat (I think the only hike I have ever really enjoyed) I started to realize that my heart just loves Europe.  Sigh. Some day.) ok back from the side note. On to another. I have a serious problem saying no. My husband was gone for three weeks and had to work another 24 hour shift last night so we planned an "us day" for today.  When my friend called and asked for a babysitter for later tonight I didn't want to say no. After discussing it with my wonderful husband and he sweetly reminded me I promised him a date day/evening and that since we have not had the chance to spend this sort of time with each other in some weeks and wont for over half of this year due to a deployment I knew I was going to have to do my unthinkable. say no.  the word is shorter than yes but for some reason still harder to say for me. The guilt over saying no sticks with me for days. (Oddly it lasts longer than the guilt at saying yes even if I happen to be saying yes to something I knew I should have said no to). I wish I could just say yes all the time!  I keep promising pictures (and to be funnier but that is another problem entirely).  I think I need help in that area.  Can anyone tell me how to post pictures or how to do a click here for more info type thing?  I swear I am the only one left that does not know.  And now it is time for me to go get ready for "Us day" with my love :).

magic fortune cookie say...

I got home tonight and felt like rambling on for a bit so here I am.  I got a fortune cookie with my Chinese dinner tonight.  My fortune said something like "you and your spouse will have a long happy relationship". How great!  If only fortune cookies were like fairy Godmothers and because it was said it shall be done.  While I do expect that my amazing husband and I will have an eternal happy relationship I don't think it will be because of some magic fortune, but rather a lot of hard work from both of us. I am headed into week three of David being gone.  It's still not easy even though we have done this a few times now.  Every time we go through it, it surprises me that its all the little things that I miss the most.  Having someone to comment to about the show that's on TV, having someone to eat dinner with, having someone to laugh with about the day.  I guess it all comes down to sharing. Life is sad when there's no sharing.  Friends are nice (though I don't have many of those in San Diego) but no one can be him, no one can be my best friend like he is.  That just may be the secret to marriage. Friendship. How many people forget that once upon time their spouse was their best friend.  That's why they married them. And that is where the romance comes from.  I hope that 50 years and a few kids down the road that David and I both still share the same playful, warm, comforting friendship that we have shared for the past few years.  We aren't afraid to disagree.  We have before and we will in the future, but as long as we remember and respect our friendship things will always be just fine.  Its interesting maintaining our relationship over e-mail. Its not ideal for sure.  But this year its what we will have.  And next year we will probably have some other obstacle in our path.  That is just how life is. And boy is it exciting.  I don't think I would have it any other way. Maybe my next post will be less serious and more humorous.  I'll try to think of some jokes.  Oh and maybe I will learn how to post pictures :)