Future Mr. President

Last weekend my cousin Landon came to visit with his wife Maegan and their son Miles. Miles is about a month younger than Jax (but way bigger!). They were pretty cute playing together the whole time. They were only here for about a day and a half, so we didn't have much time to see things  (and I am really slow because I am having a baby in less than a month!). Maegan really wanted to see the White House, so we decided to start with that and just see where things might go after that. We didn't get much further, but it was a fun day anyway!

We realized when we were looking at pictures later, that we all put on grey/black clothes like we planned to match. haha!

Future Presidents dreaming about life inside the White House.

We also discovered the new White House Visitors Center (15 minutes before it closed) which we will have to go back to some time and explore further. It was fun to have some family to visit with since we rarely get to see any living here, and fun to get out on an adventure before baby girl arrives. We miss you Hansens! Come back and visit us soon! :)

Spinning

So much has been going on lately I feel like my head is in a spin. I have been crazy busy with cake orders, last week it seemed I had at least 1 every single day, some really large projects and some smaller but it still kept me really busy. David has also been busy at school and we have spent a lot of time talking about what we are going to do after he is done with school and it is time for us to move onto another command/location. He will be making a selection soon and it's getting a bit stressful as it seems there is nothing really desirable available for when we need to leave here. There will be a lot of prayers going up about this in the next few weeks.

I have also been spending some time thinking about baby girl coming soon and figuring out logistics like where Jax will be and a plan in case I go into labor early again and have to make it to the further hospital (and the fact that David doesn't have phone access during the day). Unlike most people, for me thinking about having a baby brings up a lot of painful memories, anxiety, and heartache. To top it off, I am also really stressed about about Jax. I still find myself on the phone with insurance and doctors multiple times a week trying to advocate for him and get him better care. I have seen a lot of progress from him and it makes me really happy (and most of the time that is enough), but then we spend time with other children his age and I am reminded of all the things he can't do and how behind his peer group he really is and my heart hurts for him.

I find myself at a point (again) where I am just holding on until the next thing. Until we can make a clean start (again). I have been doing it for the last few years-just holding on until we move into a new house, just holding on until whatever hard thing is over, just holding on until something changes dramatically and I can spend time focusing on that and not think about everything else. Of course that is part of our test of life, to see how well we endure it all, but I am finally starting to realize that I can't run away from pain and memories. I can't push everyone away until there is nothing around me because that doesn't fix anything either. And because of Jax (thank goodness) I can't just lay in bed all day and focus on the aches and pains. I can't always live my life just barely holding on until the next big thing can happen that will distract me for awhile. Because really there is nowhere to run to. We could move back to San Diego which is the ideal situation, and it still doesn't change the past. It doesn't take away the heartache, it doesn't make the past disappear, it won't make things that have happened not happen, and it won't make Jax all better. And sometimes I am even torn about leaving behind a place with so many painful and bad memories, because it is also the place with my only memories.

I am looking forward to the end of October when I will have a few weeks to relax a little bit before baby comes. Luckily, I have already done most of the "get ready for baby" chores on my list and it will be nice to rest up and spend time with Jax. :)

80's Birthday Bash

It just dawned on me that I have not posted about David's birthday party and it was back in September. Oops. I failed to throw him a 30th birthday party last year because Jax never slept more than 1.5 hours at a time and I was just too tired, so I tried making it up to him this year. Since he was born in the 80's we decided to go with a fun 80's theme. We even asked everyone to dress up. We served 80's party food, had blow up instruments, microphones, sunglasses, neon bracelets and a stage for pictures (or for the kids to have their own awesome 80's band) and listened to 80's tunes the whole time. We had a great time, and we think (hope) everyone else did too.

In true 80's fashion, we hosted the party in the garage. 

David's Aunt flew in for the party. She even brought an awesome 80's outfit! And while she was here she took us to the yummiest seafood place, Legal Seafoods, in DC. SO GOOD! I wish I would have gotten a picture of the 2 dozen oysters David and Auntie DeeDee finished off in less than a minute (not even kidding).

Jax could not stop looking at David suspiciously with his wig on. He did not know what to think of his dad's new hair-do. 

We are so glad we have made so many good friends here in DC who not only showed up to the party to help me celebrate David's birthday, but they all looked AWESOME in their rad costumes.